Facts about the Dear Leader

  • Endangers the world with his belligerence and disgust with multinational efforts, especially prior to the war in Iraq.
  • Has alienated traditional allies.
  • Has shady political connections.
  • His administration has a self-righteous "we know better" attitude.
  • Has lied on multiple occasions.
  • Has won elections with questionable tactics.
  • Has an enormous cheering section which thinks he is the best president ever.
  • Critics' patriotism, honor, and integrity are often questioned.
  • To deflect attention from his policies, uses a vague and undefined foreign threat to maintain control.
  • His party controls of the legislature.
  • His economic policies have led to fewer people being employed.
  • Enemies of the state are sent to prisons with horrid conditions, but denies responsibility.
  • He was a playboy in his youth, pissing away much of it on booze and drugs.
  • It's a well-known fact that he's never actually seen combat or been in a war zone as a soldier.
  • He is a shrewd politician.
  • His brother was once the golden child expected to do great things.
  • His "predecessor in spirit" rebuilt the country's confidence, industry, economy, and triumphed over the Evil Empire.
  • His Cult wants to make the Dear Leader the next Great Leader.
  • He has the backing of the conservative and military establishment.

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